Response to Holes full of Dirt

Response to Holes full of dirt

This story is about a young man who is in high school and wants to impress a girl Ashlyn who is over a year older than he is. Because she is older she usually gives him a ride home from school. One day she pulls up to his driveway  and upon finding the road full of holes she remarks about how she might not be able to give him rides if she can’t take her car on the road. The boy decides to try and fix the rode but ends up crashing his father’s truck but his father is not mad and the son reflects of the kindness of his father as the story ends.        

I enjoyed that the story was a coming of age tale and I think it captured that point in life very well. I also think the dialogue fit very smoothly. I think that Ashlyn needs to be brought back into the story before it ends and some more back-story on the father should be shown. Also there should be some more imagery as in setting description.

The point of view for this story was first person which I believe worked very well because you could get inside the head of the main character as he experienced these very thoughtful aspects of his high school life.

The main character is a kid is well developed because you can hear his inner thoughts but I think the dad and Ashlyn need to be developed even more than they are.

The story is developed very well and I am not left with any questions about what had happened.

The imagery could be increased for a better sense of place and to describe Ashlyn who is supposedly beautiful but is not described with enough imagery.

There is some really good dialogue in this piece. When Ashlyn is talking about what she is going to do during the weekend. You learn she is likes base ball and possibly a guy named drew and that she does not want the main character to join her

The opening starts the story well but the closing ends it a little abruptly.